Superfast


I don’t really have time to be blogging, as I have a lot of other writing/reading to be doing, but here’s a list of things new and interesting:

1. I gave up all sweets (anything that could fall under the “dessert” taxonomy, from fortune cookies to bread pudding to vegan chocolate cake) and whaddya know? I lost 2.2 pounds this week. Next headline: the sky is blue! Dogs say woof! There’s no gravity in space!

2. Apparently, you’re not supposed to have that much caffeine even if you kinda-sorta want to get pregnant. Ummm … there’s no caffeine in a dirty chai is there? (Don’t answer that.) Also: holy crap, does my ob/gyn want me to take a lot of supplements! Also also, now that I’ve crossed that invisible line into 35-land, there is literally a biological clock. There is. My doc showed it to me. Shhhh. (Also also also: acupuncture? Preferable to Clomid if you don’t want to be pregnant with triplets on the second go-round.)

3. I get to have a baseline mammogram done! Damn. I thought mammograms were for old people.

4. If you tell your doc that you’ve been getting lightheaded/woozy a few times a month, she’ll dramatically label them “fainting spells” and order a CBC and complete metabolic panel. Sweet.

5. Now I remember. If my cervix “didn’t like the Pap” and I spotted a little afterwards, do I need to be worried about a recurrence of HPV (which I was diagnosed with 7 years ago, but have had normal Paps ever since)?

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6 Comments

  1. gimpy

     /  February 12, 2008

    But, there i gravity is space!!!

    Sorry to be a smart ass. But, c’mon, you know I’m reading your blog!

    Reply
  2. gimpy

     /  February 12, 2008

    That should say: there is gravity in space.

    What happened to the comment preview button?

    Reply
  3. BetsyD

     /  February 13, 2008

    There should be a test they can give you to check whether or not the HPV is still in your system. I had it a few years ago.

    My mammogram hurt like hell, but I felt good about doing it.

    Reply
  4. Mammograms. Big deal. A topless dancer shows up at your office and sings “Happy 35th Birthday.” Right? But seriously, folks… I had one a few years ago in a moment of hypochondriangst. (badda bing! I’m on a roll here…) It wasn’t nice like a massage, but it wasn’t holy hell either. Just some mooshing of flesh that would rather not be mooshed in quite that way. It’s good to have a friend in the waiting room, though.

    Reply
  5. boxingoctopus

     /  February 14, 2008

    What about taking a Vicodin or Valium before hand? Worth it?

    Reply
  6. BetsyD

     /  February 17, 2008

    Maybe some ibuprofen. It hurts but it doesn’t last long.

    Reply

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